Easter 2016

The weekend before Easter, we took Arlo to a local egg hunt.  It was huge, and had multiple fields set up for various age groups.  Arlo was in the 0-3 group, and there were (what we were told) thousands of eggs on the field.  Once they blew the whistle everyone stormed the field and it was an egg collecting frenzy.  Arlo was not in any apparent hurry and was rather gentle about his collection process but still managed to score 10 or so eggs in the short time the hunt lasted.  I was confused to find that nearly every egg contained a tootsie roll which is both a choking hazard and super unhealthy for such a young age group, but Arlo didn't seem to care that we opened them and gave the contents away pretty quickly (note to self - this won't last forever, have a backup plan for next year!)  After the hunt he played with another little boy about his age and they ran around dumping out their empty eggs and recollecting them.

The best part of the hunt was meeting the Easter bunny, which Arlo didn't get to do last year.  He was a little apprehensive about approaching him by himself, so Erik held him for a picture.  Before we walked away we asked him if he wanted to hug the Easter bunny and he did not once but twice, and with a big smile on his face.  It was pretty sinking adorable.

 

This past Sunday was Easter and I spent the evening before putting together his basket and filling up eggs with treats and small trinkets.  Erik saw everything I had set out for Arlo to find the next morning and joked that the Easter bunny was a little too generous at our house this year.  But my defense was that when your kiddo's birthday is just six days from Christmas the other holidays throughout the year are good opportunities to add in a new book, puzzle, or toy.  I always feel guilty buying him stuff for no reason and rarely do but to me Easter is a perfectly good reason for a few new things!

Arlo was pretty excited to find his little pile the next morning, and almost looked at us confused like "is this for me?"  His basket had a sketch book, crayon/paper set (for taking on the go), sidewalk chalk, kinetic sand, a little tow truck, a new book by one of our favorite authors and cute wooden alphabet puzzle.  Of course his favorite things were the $0.40 plastic wall walking bug I bought on clearance after Easter last year, the paper grass, and the basket itself which he loved wearing around all day on his head.

Since the Easter bunny wasn't sure if it was going to rain that morning, he waited to put out the eggs until the weather was clear.  Fortunately his timing was spot on, and we were able to have a little egg hunt right in our front yard, and made it back inside just minutes before the rain started.  There were three jumbo eggs with small toys inside - a talking Thomas Train in one, bubbles in another, and a light up bouncy ball in the third.  The rest were small eggs filled with mini play doh, stickers, fruit snacks, and probably half had organic animal cookies in them.  Arlo opened up the big eggs first and the look on his face when he found Thomas was priceless.  I was afraid that after he found the train it would be game over since he likely wouldn't want to put it down, but once he discovered the snacks he went from egg to egg, opening them, eating the contents, tossing the empty egg on the grass, and moving on to the next.  The fruit snacks were equally as exciting to him as finding the train.  This kid isn't much for sweets but is crazy for fruit snacks and gasped every time he found one.  Now please indulge me as I include all of my favorites from our Easter photo shoot....

telling us about the clouds and that rain comes from them

 

Even though it rained most of the rest of the day, we accomplished what we had hoped to and spent the afternoon mostly being lazy and flicking Arlo's new wall walking bug so many times that eventually it stopped sticking to the wall.  I guess I know what I will be filling his basket with next year  ;)

4 months

Hello from the second trimester.  Or, maybe I was in the second trimester when I wrote the last pregnancy post?  Does the second trimester start at 13 or 14 weeks??  I feel like with Arlo I knew every little thing that was happening as it happened.  I knew which week he was growing fingernails, when he could hear our voices, and what size fruit he was every week.  This time I am like "how many weeks am I now??"  Are we closer to a kiwi or an apple this week?  I feel so lost.  Largely this is due to the roughness of the pregnancy so far - morning sickness, fatigue, having the never ending flu.  I just don't have the energy to remember all the little details.  I have a new phone app this time around that I check from time to time, and it tells me the size of the baby in things other than food which is pretty fun - one week the baby was the size of a lego man, one week it was a troll doll.  This week it is a chipmunk, ha.  So cute.  Anyway, sorry second kid.  You might not get a baby book either.

After I wrote my last update, I had my first visit at the birthing center.  I was exactly 15 weeks at the appointment.  It went really well, especially considering it was with the one midwife I didn't really jive with last time around.  She was great though, and spent a lot of time going over my history, and with everything that happened post-partum last time around, there was a lot to talk about.  So much in fact, that we didn't even have time to do the physical exam or lab work that she had planned on doing.  I did get to hear the heartbeat though, and she said everything looked and sounded great from that perspective.  Baby was kicking so much there was almost more movement noise coming from the doppler than heartbeat sounds!  She asked if I had felt any movement yet and I told her I thought so, and actually had been feeling something for the previous couple of weeks.  I had convinced myself that it was too early to feel anything, but she said it wasn't and that she was pretty sure I was actually feeling the baby already.  I paid really close attention that afternoon following my appointment, and was then completely convinced I was feeling tiny kicks.  They have quickly grown into pretty big kicks, and the baby is already very active in there.  By 16 weeks I could feel movement outside my belly too.  Poor Erik though, every time he puts his hand on it, the baby immediately stops moving.  Arlo did the exact same thing though, sneaky little fetuses....  At the appointment I weighed in at my exact pre-pregnancy weight, which was surprising because by 10 weeks I had already gained around 2 lbs.  I must have lost more weight being sick than I thought, but I have certainly gained it all back (and then some) since then.  This baby is not only active but also hungry, and has a big sweet tooth!

I took a few photos last weekend, and was 16.5 weeks here.  Today I am 17.5.  Sorry 2.0, you are also getting the short end of the stick photo-wise.  Every week with Arlo we used our fancy camera and took several shots in our backyard against our fence.  All this kiddo is getting is iPhone photos in our bathroom.  We don't love you any less though, I promise!

One day soon I am going to put on some makeup, pants that aren't leggings, and care about how my hair looks when I take these photos.  And maybe even move to a location that isn't my bathroom, ha.  I am still not feeling 100% though - residual cough from the flu, congestion in the morning, periodic waves of nausea, and fatigue that is intermittent but sneaks up out of nowhere.  And speaking of clothing, I am haven't tried them on in a couple of weeks but I am pretty certain that I have outgrown my regular jeans now.  Leggings and pants with a more forgiving waist (like in these photos) still fit well.  Non-maternity shirts technically still fit but are starting to look weird.  Like short or something, and I look fat instead of pregnant.  So earlier this week I hauled out my maternity clothing tub and sorted through it for a few better fitting shirts.  I am in that weird in-between phase where non-maternity clothes are getting too small and maternity wear looks too big.  But I'm not worried, this belly has really started to pop, even more so now than in these photos, so my maternity wardrobe should be in full rotation by my next post.  I am actually really looking forward to maternity pants - do you know how comfortable they are?!  Why don't all jeans have a super stretchy elastic waistband?!

Our anatomy scan is in three weeks so my next update will likely follow that.  And if you are sick of baby bump pics, not to worry, the next few posts I have planned are not at all pregnancy related and will include some life updates and an Easter post after next weekend.

And last but not least, a pic of me and my little guy from earlier this week on St. Patricks day.  I worked that day but we both wore our green and no one could pinch us!  I told Arlo to "wink for Grandma" (she always asks him for a wink when we face time) and I ended up loving this photo even more than the others where his eyes were open...

3 months

these pregnancy posts were kept private until we were ready to announce the happy news to friends and family.  this post originally written on 3/1/16.  


So, my last pregnancy post was written just over a month ago, and I have a whole bunch of updates since then.  The nausea finally started easing up a bit around week 11, but the fatigue still persisted.  Nearly two weeks ago, the morning of 13 weeks - I woke up at 4am with what I thought was either the stomach flu or food poisoning.  Erik had to stay home that day and take care of both Arlo and I, and I remained in bed for the entire day.  The following day the GI symptoms were gone, but I was left feeling completely drained, dehydrated, and starting to feel like I was getting a bad cold.  I continued to feel that way all weekend, until Monday when I finally took Arlo to the sitters and myself to the doctors.  My own personal diagnosis was stomach flu followed immediately by bronchitis, but her diagnosis (which I now completely agree with) was the flu.  Ugh!  Why is it that every time I get pregnant I get the worst case of the flu (plus complications)?!?!  She initially didn't want to prescribe me anything but I literally begged (that morning I had a three hour coughing fit that made me vomit twice and incontinent of pee - yea I really just said that) so finally she called the birthing center to see what they would approve.  They were okay with me taking the prescription cough syrup with codeine and even though I am usually anti-medication I was pretty desperate for relief.  So I thought I was through the worst of it at that point, but no.  The next day I started getting fevers, body aches, dizzy spells, headaches and came down with a very painful sinus infection.  Erik took Arlo to the babysitters everyday because there was absolutely no way I could care for him, I could barely care for myself.  I hardly ate anything and even though I know I was forcing fluids I know I was still dehydrated.  Erik offered on two different days to take me to the ER but I declined, and really, there is nothing they would have been able to do for me anyway.  So this all lasted for literally ten days until yesterday when I finally started to feel half human again.  I actually put on clothes and set foot outside the house for the first time since the day I went to the doctors.  And even though I am still coughing a lot and pretty easily tired by day to day activities, I am feeling so much better than last week.  Man, the flu absolutely sucks.  So bad.  Even worse when you are preggo because the medication options are so limited and your immune system is lower than usual leaving you extra susceptible to secondary infections. 

I have no idea what pregnancy symptoms I have been having these past two weeks.  I am more tired than usual throughout the day but I blame that largely on the flu.  I think from a pregnancy standpoint I am feeling pretty good.  I am still waiting for my belly to really pop out, when I was sick I would look in the mirror and not even look 1% pregnant.  But the past few days I have been literally eating until I feel stuffed and drinking like a fish, and when I snapped a few pictures of my belly this morning I actually think it looks like something is there. 

I still haven't washed my hair since before I got sick (but have big plans to do so tonight, woo hoo), am wearing zero makeup, and our bathroom mirror is a splattered mess but this was the best I could do.  I am two days shy of 15 weeks here.

In other news, after I wrote my last update we met with the home birth midwife I had been so hopeful to work with.  I was completely sure I was going to love her and that a home birth was going to be somehow even more relaxed and laid back than our experience at the birthing center.  I was surprised to find out this was not the case.  The midwife was nice, and did spend a good amount of time with us at our first meeting, but I left her office feeling confused and conflicted.  She not only required me to meet with her every four weeks until week 28 (I think?) and then more frequently the rest of the pregnancy, but she also required me to meet with a group of doctors at a hospital that I wouldn't even be transferred to in an emergency because it's a good 45 minutes from our house.  I would have to meet with them a total of four times, which would be an extra expense with our new (crappy) insurance.  On top of that, because of my post-partum mood issues last time around, she required me to seek mental health treatment before the baby was born - again, an additional expense.  And I know anyone I saw would recommend anti-depressants in the third trimester to try and "prevent" PPD/PPA but that is not something I am willing to do.  As such, I would need to go to a different location to have blood work drawn, and yet another to have any ultrasounds that I need.  So when I thought about all the different places I needed to go and things I had to do it suddenly felt overwhelmingly complicated.  As well, there was no way to know until after the birth how much (or how little) that our insurance company would cover for a home birth.

I then thought back to our experience at the birthing center - smooth, relaxed, never pressured, and simple, and decided that I wanted to go back.  Everything that I need can be done at the birthing center, except the ultrasound which can actually be done at a hospital that is close to our house.  The appointments are far less frequent if you have already had a successful birth there before, and I will only need to go every six weeks in the first two trimesters.  I know insurance will cover it, and can do all of my prenatal appointments in the morning on one of my work days, while I am already in the area.  The one and only downside, is that when I go into labor it is around a 45 minute drive to get there, and that is with no traffic.  If it is morning or evening rush hour - it could easily be closer to a two hour drive.  When I was in labor with Arlo, the 12 minute drive to the birthing center was one of the worst parts of the entire experience, although I do think I hit transition on the way.  But still, I wish not for our kid to be born rolling down the highway so we will be planning to head to the birthing center, or someplace a lot closer than our house, when early labor starts.  As soon as I told the home birth midwife that we wouldn't be continuing care with her and made my first appointment with the birthing center, I felt a huge wave of relief.  And while I am just a little sad that we won't be having a home birth this time around, I know it my heart that this is the right thing for us and that I would have been deeply questioning my decision had we proceeded with the home birth plan.

My first appointment was scheduled for last week but with the flu and everything I had to reschedule it for later this week.  We heard the heartbeat via doppler at 10 weeks when we met with the first midwife, but it will certainly be a relief to hear it again.  I spent a lot of time worrying about the baby when I was sick and I took more medicine than I really wanted to.  I am sure everything is probably okay in there but I am looking forward to that reassurance at the appointment!

We will be scheduling the anatomy scan ultrasound around 18-20 weeks, so my next update will probably come after that.  We shared the happy news with family and close friends in the last couple of weeks, but will wait until after the ultrasound to post anything on social media.  But, if all is well after the appointment later this week I will probably release all these pregnancy posts I have been writing  :D

Cheers to the second trimester, saying good-bye to that evil flu, and all the good things that are coming soon.  Until next time!

10 weeks + an ultrasound

these pregnancy posts were kept private until we were ready to announce the happy news to friends and family.  this post originally written on 1/29/16. 

I wasn't going to write another pregnancy update until month three but I am popping in today with some exciting news!  We have our first picture of 2.0:

I have realized a big perk to working in a department with it's own ultrasound machine and nice CRNA's who are willing to help me use it - an early peek at 2.0 that I otherwise wouldn't have been able to have!  We have a couple of ultrasound machines in our department that the anesthesia team use primarily for peripheral nerve blocks and to start super difficult IV's.  Well, I work the evening shift when the machines are never in use, so I decided yesterday to sneak away for a few minutes and see if I could get a look at the baby.  I tried first with the fancier looking machine, which, also turned out to be the more complicated one, and I couldn't figure it out using the deep wand, which I would need to see the baby.  Just as I was putting it back a CRNA popped by and I asked him if he knew how to use it.  When he realized it was for me he got really excited and kept saying "this is SO exciting" ha!  We couldn't get the correct wand on the first machine to work, so he got the second one going for me and then stepped behind the curtain to give me privacy.  I found an image of the baby immediately and couldn't contain my excitement.  He said "you can see something?!" and I told him yes and if he wanted he could some see it too.  I think he was more excited than I was and I think we were both surprised that the baby is so fully developed at just 10 weeks.  I could see it's little head, body, arms, legs and even the feet!  He/she was pretty active, kicking and dancing all over.  I could have watched the screen for a lot longer but I kept it pretty short to just around five minutes.  I took several screen shots with my phone, and a couple of short videos. 

So now that it is looking like we are officially having another kid, it's time to slowly start spreading the news to friends and family.  A few people already know out of necessity (it would have been pretty impossible to hide that morning sickness from everyone) but I am excited to start telling people.  I don't expect these pregnancy posts to go live for another month or so, I would like to be safely into the second trimester before it really becomes public information.

In other super exciting news from yesterday - we also heard back from the home birth midwife I have been trying to get in touch with for several weeks now.  She is one of the only legal home birth midwifes in the area, and from what everyone was saying about her, I thought she was planning to take a sabbatical this year and not be available.  I was so shocked when she wrote back that while August was looking to be a very busy month birth-wise for her, she is currently accepting patients and wants to meet in person!  I will write more later on our decision to choose a home birth, and I am not even 100% sure it's going to work out, but I am now more hopeful than ever.

Back in a couple of weeks with the three month update.  Yay, baby!

two months

these pregnancy posts were kept private until we were ready to announce the happy news to friends and family.  this post originally written on 1/18/16.

Well, things changed drastically since my last update.  During my pregnancy with Arlo, I had virtually no morning sickness.  Slight nausea, never even came close to getting sick, and I think it lasted a maximum of a few weeks.  For some reason, I guess I just assumed that the next pregnancy would be the same.  Well.... not so much.  Almost exactly at the five week mark, I started to feel pretty nauseated.  It was during the end of our Tennessee trip, and since we had decided to hold off on telling family about the pregnancy for a while yet, I just had to do the best I could to hide being nauseated.  Things only got worse when we got home, and I spent most mornings completely useless on the couch, super nauseous and exhausted.  Most of the time I could fight off actually throwing up, but I think that was almost worse because after I did I usually felt a little better.  Over the last couple of weeks the "morning" sickness has actually turned into "evening" sickness, and almost like clockwork between 4-5pm everyday, I start to feel the drained, nauseated feeling coming on.  I suppose it's probably better to feel this way later in the day, as Erik is home from work around then and able to help with Arlo.  When I was feeling my worst in the earlier part of the day I would do the minimum needed to care for Arlo, and we would spend the rest of the time watching Mickey Mouse - or laying on the floor someplace while he played and I fought back throwing up...  Now after we put Arlo to bed around 7:30pm or so, I head straight for the shower and then to bed myself.  (ok well, to be honest I binge watch Nurse Jackie until I can't keep my eyes open anymore, but at least it helps take my mind off of my sick stomach!)  I am wearing my sea bands 24/7 (except at work where they would certainly give away my secret), have tried all the ginger everything, and started on a new vitamin regimen, all offering little relief.  I think the sea bands might help a little, and whether the relief is psychological or physical, I will take it however I can get it.

So, I am really not trying to complain here, but this pregnancy is not the blissful, easy experience I had with Arlo, and since I am documenting things, well, I am gonna put the good, bad, and ugly all out there.  The sickness has been my most prominent symptom, but in addition my ta-ta's are also blowing up to a new size, and I can actually already feel a small bump in my lower abdomen if I am laying flat on my back.  I think I could feel the same size bump around 11 or 12 weeks with Arlo, and I am 8 weeks right now.  I have read that with a second kid you will likely start to show about a month before you did with the first, and while I am certainly not showing yet, there are definitely some changes going on in there.

At this point we are still uncertain where I am going to go for my prenatal care and the birth.  I am still exploring our options and while I know I need to make an appointment in the next few weeks here, the sense of urgency is not as it was last time around.  I am going to use the doppler or perhaps even the ultrasound machine we have in my department at work (if I can sneakily find someone who can help me get it working) and check the heartbeat in the next couple of weeks. Even though I have a really good feeling that things are moving along like they should with the pregnancy, hearing the heartbeat will really put my mind at ease and help me be comfortable in taking the next step to choose where we will go for the birth, as well as share the news with friends and family who don't already know.  The birthing center where Arlo was born is high on my list of places to go, but given my quick labor the first time around and the fact that we are now much further away, I have some concerns with getting there in time when I go into labor.  I do not want this kid born while rolling down I-40!

Anyway...  Here are a couple pictures I took yesterday.  Any and all belly roundness is total bloat from my transition from a virtually gluten-free to a gluten-filled, carb-loaded diet.  Weeks 5-7 when I felt the worst I pretty much lived on saltines and broth, but have since introduced copious amounts of whole grain bread, pasta, and such into my daily menu.  I wouldn't say I am having "cravings", it's more like I have a strong desire to eat the one and only thing that sounds good in the moment.  Vegan PB cookie from Whole Foods?  Erik will run to the store, I just have to say the word.  Popcorn for dinner?  Not really a meal but better than not eating anything.  I am still trying to include as many vegetables and beans in my diet as I can, it's just hard right now to eat as much of them as I usually do.  Anyway, bloat belly:

That is pretty much all I have to say for now.  I will be back in another month or so with hopefully a confirmed heartbeat, less nausea (fingers crossed), and a bigger belly  ;)

one month

these pregnancy posts were kept private until we were ready to announce the happy news to friends and family.  this post originally written on 12/20/15.

It seems a little silly to start writing updates at just a month.  But I am gonna do it anyway.  My plan is to write an update every month of the pregnancy so I gotta start sometime.

Officially I am four weeks plus a couple of days.  And overall feeling pretty good.  A few symptoms have popped up in the last week which is a fantastic sign that things are moving along in a good direction, and have eased some worry.  So far no morning sickness, but something of the opposite.  I am hungry. all. the. freaking. time.  Two hours after a regular sized meal I find myself already looking for a snack.  Unfortunately regular food doesn't sound all that great now, and all I have been feeling like is carbs (read: vegan mac & cheese like every every day.)  I have also been dealing with some insomnia which is not helping the waves of fatigue that have been coming and going.  The fatigue isn't too bad yet, just my body's way of telling me to go to bed early or to sit down and rest for a bit.  Breast tenderness started a few days ago, noticed only when my toddler decided to body slam my chest. 

What is even sillier than writing this little update is to post a belly pic when the belly is non-existent.  So, we will just call this the "before" picture.  I took this photo this morning on my way to yoga.  I didn't have on a stitch of makeup and the mirror is covered in water spots, but whatev.

So, that is really all I have to say for now.  I have a really good feeling that this pregnancy is headed in the right direction and if all goes well I will write more in another month! 

plus one.

This post will be kept hidden until we have decided to share the big news with everyone.  I want to document things as they are happening like I have done with our previous pregnancies so I don't have to struggle to remember things that happened months ago!  

Post originally written on 12-12-15.


Some big news today...  I am pregnant!  As I write this I can't believe that I am.  I don't know what made me take a test this morning, it shouldn't even register positive for several more days.  But there it was this morning, a loud and clear blue plus sign on that little white stick.  I didn't tell Erik right away.  I don't know how I kept it a secret all through breakfast, but I wanted to tell him in a sweet way that would make it special for all of us.  A couple of months ago, when we were starting to talk seriously about trying for 2.0, I found the perfect shirt at Target on super clearance for like $2 to help me make the announcement to Erik.  I was hopeful that it would still fit Arlo by the time I was pregnant, and luckily, it fit just right.  So this morning after breakfast, I took Arlo upstairs to get him ready for the day, pulled out the shirt from the back of his closet where I had been hiding it, and brought him downstairs in it.  Erik was in the other room, so Arlo and I sat in the playroom and waited for him to come in.  It didn't take him long to notice it, and he read it really slowly out loud.  "Number one, best... what does that last word say?  Bro?  What are you trying to say with that shirt??"  I asked him what he thought I was trying to say, and he responded "Pregnant?!  Are you really pregnant??"  It took a few seconds for it to sink in that I wasn't kidding, and then he got really excited and came to sit next to me on the floor.  We talked about the due date (late August), whether or not we will find out the gender (he wants to, I don't), and then immediately Erik proclaimed "woah, we need to get you a new car sooner than later!" and I kid you not, within ten minutes of hearing the news he was sitting at his computer shopping for a new (not brand new, just bigger) car.  And that my folks, is my husband, ha!

I know the pregnancy is still very early (I am barely three weeks) so I think we are both trying not to get overly excited in light of what happened the first time around.  But still, chances are better than not that things will go as planned and we are really looking forward to adding another family member.  And I am really happy about the timing and the fact that we will be having a warm weather baby.  I was hoping to have our next kiddo born in late summer or early fall so I am pretty excited about the due date.

When Erik and I started talking about adding another family member, it was sometime last spring.  We thought that we would probably start to feel ready at the end of the summer, and that is when we would start trying for 2.0.  However, August arrived and I was in no way feeling ready to be pregnant or even think about another baby.  Erik was still getting used to his new job, we had just moved into our new house in a new city, and still hadn't sold our old house.  I had a bit of a hard time adjusting to all the new changes in life, and was not feeling ready to bring on any additional stress.  As well, I had the realization that I really needed Arlo to be a little older before another kid entered the picture.  I decided it would all probably be a lot easier if he was potty trained, moved out of the nursery and sleeping in a big boy bed in his new room, and closer to three years old in age.  So, we decided to put it off for a few more months.  Eventually we settled in to all the big life changes, our house started feeling a lot more like home, and I started to feel ready for 2.0.  Well, things happened pretty quickly and I guess that's why I am still somewhat shocked that I am sitting here today writhing this post!

Soooo....  I know that it's going to be a while before we get an actual confirmation that this pregnancy is progressing normally, and for that reason we are still debating on when to spill the beans.  We will be visiting my family in two weeks for Christmas, and Erik's family is coming to our house the week after for Arlo's birthday, so it would be great to tell them all in person.  But at the same time we really don't want to get everyone all excited before we know for sure that things are going as they should.

Somehow during my pregnancy with Arlo I wrote a pregnancy update every week.  How?!  I guess I didn't have a toddler to look after, that's how!  Well, this time around my goal is to check in every month or so.  I really did love documenting Arlo's growth in my belly and hopefully this pregnancy will go just as smoothly as his did.  So, there are a lot more things I want to write about but for today I am just going to try and soak it all in and enjoy the day with my boys.