Third Trimester Essentials

Even though I am nearly three months postpartum and pregnancy seems like a distant memory, my OCD won't let me skip the final installment of my mini-series: Trimester Essentials.  You can find my first trimester essentials here, and my second trimester essentials here.  Due to my lack of time these days, I am going to keep this short and sweet and just list a few things that helped me through the final trimester of pregnancy.

Birth Ball

Recommended by our Bradley class instructor, I purchased an inexpensive yoga ball online (I found a deal on Amazon for less than $5 shipped) and swapped out my computer desk chair for the large inflatable ball, somewhere around the start of the third trimester.  This gave me a little time each day in a squatting position, opening my hips and helping baby move down.  Plus it was pretty comfortable to sit on and allowed for good posture.  In fact, three months postpartum and I still use it as my desk chair, on the rare chance I get to have some computer time.  Side note:  putting Arlo in the moby or agility wrap and gently bouncing on the ball allows me to hold him hands-free, keeping him happy and allowing me to get these blog posts written!  ;)

My husband's t-shirts and winter coat

Erik doesn't actually own this shirt, but wouldn't have been sweet if one of us had showed up to the birth wearing it?

A few weeks before the birth, I started to raid Erik's closet for oversized t-shirts to sleep and lounge in since my maternity shirts were all pretty fitted and getting even tighter by the day.  Plus, my winter coat was just barely able to zip up over the bump, so when I was aiming to be more comfortable on the daily walks I was talking with Lucy, I borrowed Erik's coat!

Childbirth Books

Since we were taking a Bradley Class series, it would make sense that we focused on Bradley method books.  This one by Susan McCutcheon was highly recommended by our instructor and the one that we read the most.  Admittedly, I had purchased eight or ten other books related to childbirth, and didn't find time to read very many of them before the birth.  The best preparation was taking the class, and reading this book on the side.

 Evening Primrose Oil

The birthing center recommended that I start taking Evening Primrose Oil at 37 or 38 weeks of pregnancy.  I ended up taking it for just a few days, and then started having some signs that labor was not far away, so the midwife recommended that I hold off on continuing to take it.  I don't think the Primrose caused Arlo to arrive eight days ahead of schedule, but had I continued to take it perhaps he would have come even earlier.  However, Primrose Oil is supposed to be good for preventing post-term labor so for future pregnancies I would surely take it again.


That's all I can think of for now...  Next up, my list of post-partum and newborn essentials!

Arlo: One and Two Months

Since Arlo is nearly three months old now, it's pretty obvious that I am seriously behind on writing his monthly updates!  I am going to combine the first two months in this post, and hopefully get back on track to post his updates in a reasonable amount of time...

One Month Old:

At one month old, we were still getting to know the little guy and figure out this whole parenting thing.  Some things came very naturally (holding, soothing and determining needs), and other things felt like we were making it up as we went along (cutting his razor sharp fingernails and fitting his flailing arms into those tiny clothes!)

While we spent the first few days at home as just a family of three, we soon had a steady stream of visitors, and seriously appreciated all the help that came with!  My parents visited when Arlo was about a week old.  Erik's brother Scott came the following weekend and his parents a week later.  Around the time Arlo turned a month old my sister Megan flew down from the windy city to meet her nephew.  Everyone was so excited to meet the brand new baby and it was wonderful to have our immediate families visiting us.

Arlo, one month old.

Here is a little rundown on how Arlo was doing at a month old:

Sleeping:  He slept in the co-sleeper for the first three weeks, then the rock and play next to the bed for the rest of the month.  He woke up 2-3 times per night to eat and usually went back to sleep pretty easily.  Most of the day was spent sleeping, either in our arms, the rock and play, or next to me on our bed while I was awake.
Eating:  Arlo ate 9-10 times per day at this age.  The first two weeks we breastfed without any problems, and around two weeks I started having nipple pain.  This was the beginning of the breastfeeding challenges that we are still working through upon writing this post.
Weight and length:  At his one month pediatrician visit, he weighed 7 lbs 4 oz, putting him in just the 2nd percentile for weight.  This was a little concerning as he should have gained considerably more weight than that.  Not long after his one month visit, I started exclusively pumping which allowed me to measure how much milk he was taking in each day.  Needless to say, by the next weigh-in he had more than caught up to where he should have been!
His length at one month measured 21.5 inches, putting him in the 59th percentile (long, skinny baby!)
His head measured 15 inches, which is the 84th percentile.
Wearing:  Still in newborn size clothes, they were actually fitting him quite well at this age.  In his first week or two of life the newborn size seemed huge and we probably could have gotten use out of some premie sized clothes.
Likes and dislikes:  It's somewhat hard to determine what Arlo liked at this age, but if I had to guess I would say he was happiest snoozing on a warm chest, and eating frequently.  Around the end of month one he started to show some interest in the ceiling fan in our bedroom. He didn't seem too interested in a pacifier although he would take it from time to time.
As far as dislikes, he hated having his diaper changed or being naked.  He screamed so loud you would think someone was trying to hurt him!  This upset me every single time and I wondered why on earth the diaper change thing was such a big deal...  Eventually I learned that this was quite normal for newborns and he would soon  outgrow it.
New milestones and developments:  At a month old, Arlo wasn't doing a whole lot besides being a cuddly newborn!  He wouldn't yet look at our faces for more than a second or two and only seemed to enjoy staring at the ceiling fan and the highly contrasted Calla Lily photo hanging above our bed.  His hair started falling out around two weeks of age, but only on the top of his head!  He kept the hair around the back and sides, and combined with his wrinkly little forehead took on the appearance of a very tiny, and very cute old man!  During tummy time, he could pick up his head for a very short time but that was about it for neck strength.

Arlo, one month old and partially bald!

Two Months Old:

Arlo, two months old.

Somewhere in the second month, Arlo seemed to change from a petite newborn to a drooling, happy baby complete with chubbier cheeks and a gummy smile.  We had more visitors this month.  My sister Megan had flown in at the end of January and stayed for over a week.  My parents drove in from Tennessee so they could be here to see Megan as well as visit with us and Arlo.

Sleeping:  At two months, Arlo was still sleeping much of the day but was spending a bit more time awake, showing us his developing personality!  He was still waking up usually twice in the night to eat.  During his second month, I pumped for every feeding day and night, and our nighttime routine consisted of feeding him upon waking up, pumping for the next feeding, changing his diaper, cleaning all the pump parts and making up the next bottle, then writing everything down so I could keep track of how much milk I was making and he was eating, the entire process taking at least an hour.  Not something I really enjoyed doing twice in the night, plus right before bed and again upon waking up for the day.
Eating:  Since I was always measuring his milk for feedings, I knew exactly how much he was getting everyday.  He would eat seven or eight times during the day, and took in around 22-25 ounces daily.  He had no problems adjusting from the breast to the bottle and ate like a champ!  Thanks to some donor milk from a trusted friend at the beginning of the month when my supply was a bit low, Arlo has had only breast milk since birth.
Weight and length:  At his two month pediatrician appointment, Arlo had plumped up to a healthy 10 lbs, 2 oz, bringing him into the 9th percentile for weight!  He started to develop cute neck and thigh fat rolls, and chubbier cheeks.
He didn't grow as much in the length department (his body was probably working on adding all that fat!) and only measured 22 1/4 inches in length, which is the 23rd percentile.
His head continued to remain large for his body, measuring 16 inches and falling into the 91st percentile.
Wearing:  During his second month, Arlo started gaining weight rapidly and soon the newborn clothes were outgrown, packed up in a tub, and put away in the attic (sniff, sniff).  He spent a short time in the 0-3 month clothes, and before I knew it fit into size 3 months, which he is still wearing at 2.5 months.
Likes and dislikes:  Arlo has become pretty good at letting us know what he likes and what he disapproves of.  He absolutely loves the ceiling fan in our bedroom.  It has become quite the obcession.  When other methods fail to calm him down during fussy periods, I stick him in the rock and play under the fan and turn it on low.  The dark wood and bronze metal of the fan against the white ceiling create quite the contrast, and seem to put him in almost a hypnotic state.  Forget baby toys and mobiles, ceiling fans are where it's at!
At two months, Arlo started to enjoy his swing, and actually pays attention to the mirror and toys hanging above him.
As far as dislikes go, I will say he developed a general dislike for the evening hours.  He has an hour or so of fussiness that seems to respond to something different every night.  It's a gamble of what he wants - food, pacifier, diaper change, walking/bouncing, to be held, to be in his swing...  The list goes on.  We usually figure it out be sometimes he just needs to work through it.
New milestones and developments: Around 6 or 7 weeks old, Arlo started to slowly give us his first real smiles.  He had been "sleep smiling" since birth but never any intentional show of happy emotion.  Strangely enough, the times we get the most smiles are at diaper changes, which used to be the times he cried the most!  I never would have believed he would go from screaming to smiling in just over a months time.  He looks at us all the time now and seems to recognize Erik and I as familiar faces.  At two months the salivary glands start to open up for most babies, and they did so right on time for this little guy.  Thankfully, so far he is not a very heavy drooler.  He spits up enough with feedings that if he was drooling all the time he would probably be wearing a bib day and night!
Finally, at two months his neck has grown much stronger and he can hold his head up for short periods.  He gets to be a bit of a bobblehead after a bit though.  During feedings when he is leaning against our chest for a burp, he starts bobbing his head around quite violently sometimes, and has even given me a slight fat lip from crashing it into my face! 

Arlo, two months old

Arlo, we love you so much and are watching in amazement as you grow and change so quickly right before our eyes.  More big changes to share in his next update as Arlo turns three months old!

Expectations vs. Reality

When I was pregnant, I had a lot of expectations on how life would be once our little guy arrived. I had my mind made up that certain things were going to be done a certain way, and never gave too much thought to things not working out the way I had planned. Here is how some of those things have played out for us, so far...

Breastfeeding:

Expectation:  I never had any expectations with breastfeeding other than it would come as a natural process, and never saw us having any problems with it.  I was going to be one of those moms who had no trouble breastfeeding in public, and planned to do so proudly.  I also expected to breastfeed for a full 12 months, and longer if possible.

Reality:  My last post was a rather long and detailed account of our breastfeeding experience and challenges so far. I was hoping by now that I would be able to write about how things have improved, but sadly there have not really been any changes. After ruling out Raynauds and Thrush as possible causes of my pain, I ended up seeing a well known breast pain specialist at the local university. Her theory is that I am having referred pain caused by the initial breastfeeding trauma. It is like my nerves and pain receptors are highly sensitized and won't calm down. The treatment is to break the pain cycle, which the physician feels might be accomplished through some medications we have not yet tried. So far I have tried Zyrtec (yes the allergy med) and Propranolol which is yet another medication used typically to treat blood pressure.  Not having any success with those, I was put on an anti-depressant (but not for depression) last week, called Nortriptyline.  This medication is also used to treat nerve pain so the hope is that it will decrease the pain and once it is gone I can stop the med.  So far, this has been the worst one yet in terms of side effects.  Since I started taking it, I have pretty much walked around in a zombie-like state and feel sedated all the time.  I am hoping that as my body gets used to it I will start to feel more normal, I can't see being on this for very long otherwise.  It's too soon to tell if it will help with my nipple pain...

Co-Sleeping:

Expectation:  Erik and I designed and built an awesome co-sleeper for Arlo in the months before he was born.  I expected him to use this until he was five or six months old, or able to sit up on his own at which time it would become unsafe to let him sleep in it.

Reality: When Arlo got sick with that respiratory virus at three weeks old, I started putting him to sleep next to the bed in his rock and play sleeper, as it kept him at an incline and seemed to help him breathe better.  He slept in there for a week, and just as he was feeling better I had started pumping exclusively so he was eating from the bottle full time.  Since he takes milk from the bottle so much faster than the breast (even with "paced bottle feeding" which we have been doing), he seems to have a good bit of reflux.  If he lays flat after eating, he tends to spit up a decent amount (of my precious and painfully pumped milk!)  Wanting him to keep in as much milk as possible, I let him continue to sleep in the rock and play.  After seven weeks of this, I became increasingly sad that the co-sleeper had turned into more or less a storage shelf next to the bed, and decided we would try the co-sleeper again and see how things went.  Erik built a wooden "ramp" which we put under the mattress to create a slight incline.  Fortunately with that in place, Arlo has been sleeping fine for the last few nights and has had very little reflux.  I am really enjoying sleeping so close to him again and happy that the co-sleeper is finally being put to it's intended use.

Cloth diapering:

Expectation:  I spent a ridiculous amount of time during the pregnancy researching cloth diapers and deciding which ones we were going to use.  Erik and I even took a two hour cloth diapering class together to learn all about the different options available.  I settled on prefolds and covers since they were easy and economical.  My Mom made us a huge set of cloth wipes as we had decided since we would be washing diapers we might as well wash the wipes too.  I purchased 25 or so diapers with the intent to use them soon after birth.  In fact, I only planned to use disposables during the first week or so until all the meconuim had passed.  I purchased just two small packages of the most natural disposables I could find, and actually worried I might have bought too many.  

Reality:  I almost have to laugh at how different reality is from what I had expected regarding the plan for cloth diapering.  Arlo was so tiny at first that none of the cloth diapers I had bought even came close to fitting him.  After a few weeks (and many more packages of disposables purchased) I tried using the prefolds and covers we had bought, even though they were still pretty large on his small body.  This was around the same time that we were having rash problems, so I went back to disposables so we could use the prescribed ointment and heavy duty rash cream.  Once the rash went away, I went back to the cloth diapers, only to have the rash come back.  So frustrating!  Also, I had realized that the prefold style diapers were terrible at drawing wetness away from his skin.  I was grossed out by how wet he was when I changed him, even if I was doing so every two hours or less.  I decided we were going to try and simplify things, as we were already having so many other issues with breastfeeding and such, and went back to disposables full time.  At the recommendation of a friend, we started using Nature Babycare diapers and Water Wipes.  Both of these products have been awesome for Arlo's super sensitive skin.

Finally, around eight weeks old, I decided to try the cloth diapers again.  Friends had given us some fuzzibunz all-in-one diapers which initially I wasn't sure I would like.  As it turns out, these have been the best cloth diapers we have.  They are awesome wicking away the moisture from his skin, and so far we have had almost zero rash or irritation.  We are still using disposables, but only at night.  So far this system is working for us but as I acquire more of these type of diapers I would like to switch to using them full time.

Baby Wearing:

Expectation:  I had expected to spend much of my time at home wearing Arlo on my chest in a wrap or carrier.  I had bought a Moby, Ergo, Maya sling, and even made my own wrap.  When we went on shopping trips or out to run errands I planned to pop him in the carrier and wear him everywhere we went.

Reality: Sadly, due to the breast pain I have been having since he was just two weeks old, I have been unable to wear him in the wraps and carriers nearly as much as I had planned.  I usually try everyday to wear him a little bit, but sometimes the pain and sensitivity is too much and I have to take him out.  We have done several walks in the neighborhood using the carrier but I am often quite uncomfortable by the time we get home.  Also, I wish I could say that I like the wraps more than I actually do.  The Moby is not a quick thing to put on and usually takes a few times to get it adjusted exactly how I need it.  Sometimes I don't use it just because I don't want to take the time to put it on.  I was super excited about the Ergo, it was one of my favorite baby purchases we made prior to his birth.  Unfortunately in the beginning I had trouble getting it adjusted to fit my body.  It gave me a lot of back pain after just a few minutes of wearing.  When I finally got it adjusted, I started using it on our daily walks.  I realized after a few minutes of walking the straps nearly rubbed the back of my arms raw.  At this time, Ergo is primarily used by Erik who finds it pretty comfortable to wear.
A few weeks ago Erik and I were out at one of the big box baby stores looking at jogging strollers, and I noticed a display with different wraps and carriers on it.  I tried on the JJ Cole Agility Stretch Wrap and immediately fell in love.  It is just like the Moby, without having to actually wrap or adjust anything.  I bought it on the spot and used it at our next destination that day - Trader Joes.  It takes about 30 seconds to put on and get Arlo settled in.  I have been using this carrier exclusively since we got it.  The only downside that I can see is as he grows the wrap will probably get too small.  I am hopeful at this time we can switch over to the Ergo and figure out something to keep the straps from rubbing my arms.  I really want to love the Ergo as much as I do my new wrap!

So, obviously none of the things I had "expected" went the way I had planned.  Most of the problems stemmed from the breast pain and it affected different aspects of life other than just breastfeeding.  If I didn't have the pain, I would be wearing him a lot more.  I also wouldn't have had to use the bottle which seemed to cause the reflux and he probably would have been fine in his co-sleeper this whole time.  I am still hopeful that we will find a resolution to the pain and perhaps everything else will fall into place at that time as well.  For now, I am just trying to roll with whatever happens and have been learning to expect the unexpected...